I don’t know about you, but I love beginnings. Starting something new just fills me with so much excitement, hope, and energy.
Endings, not so much.
Don’t get me wrong, I know that every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end. Thanks, Semisonic for popularizing this Seneca quote in the song Closing Time.
It’s a great reminder that nothing is static and things always change.
There are new beginnings and with that comes endings, too. Nothing lasts forever, including our businesses, hobbies, favorite media, and even our lives.
My grandpa used to say that no one makes it out alive.
But how do we honor the endings?
One way we can make peace and even enjoy endings is to honor them. How can we give endings a different energy but just as much love as beginnings?
Maybe it’s not the same excitement and hope, but it can instead be an appreciation for what was and an opening for what will be.
As the year winds down, we have one ending ahead of us.
We focus a lot on the beginning of the new year, but we can also appreciate what this year’s ending means, too.
In nature, it’s fun to think about planting new things. It starts out as a seed placed in the soil and then after growing, photosynthesizing, flowering, fruiting, and then withering it dies. That part is important because otherwise, we won’t achieve growth in the next season.
That plant decomposes and becomes food for the soil microorganisms that will feed future plants.
Let’s look at the different ways we can honor endings.
#1 Finishing what we start
Sometimes if you’re a starter like me, it’s much easier to start something than to finish something.
You might be so focused on the early stages that getting to the end feels like a chore.
When drafting my first novel, I wrote tens of thousands of words building this story world and having stuff happen in my characters’ lives… only to try to wrap up the entire story in one “day” in the characters’ lives.
The ending of a book shouldn’t be rushed because that’s where the emotional payoff happens for the reader. My brilliant developmental editors pointed that out, and it was easy to see that I got bored and tried to wrap things up quickly at the end.
This same type of rushing can happen when we try to finish other things, too.
If you spend a lot of time recording a podcast or video but don’t spend the extra time to edit or export the file in a high-quality format, you’re not honoring the work that went into it.
Or, maybe you’re moving on from another project or type of work. How can you end things on a good note? How can you wrap up any loose ends so that things end well?
You might also realize that you’re not the best person to bring a project to completion. There’s nothing wrong with that. You can hand it off to someone else who can keep it going, wrap it up, or put the finishing touches on it.
For many years in my business career, I wrote newsletters and had someone on my team load them up and manage publication schedules.
Similarly, when I knew it was time to move on from AccessAlly, I found someone who would be able to take it over and keep it going for our clients long term.
#2 Gratitude for the whole
Gratitude might be cliche, but when we’re closing a chapter, it’s a great way to give ourselves the gift of reflection.
Some endings happen because of choices we make, while others happen outside of our control. Finding the lessons in both situations can be powerful.
Right now I’m learning how to tan sheep pelts because it’s a way to honor the death of our sheep. We want to use all the parts of the animal, and that means giving their wooly pelts a new life as a rug or cushion.
This is another approach to gratitude: making the most of what we have. Even when it’s difficult and requires us to step outside our skill level and usual expertise.
This might be a great time to express gratitude for something that ended. It could be a relationship, a project, a dream you’re letting go of, a dear pet, or anything else.
#3 Taking the time to grieve
This year brought many changes to our lives, but a big one was the death of our dog Millie. She lived with us for 14 years and she was 16 years old when she started losing her eyesight and hearing, and then her digestion very rapidly last summer.
She was an amazing companion and witnessed the birth of our kids, several moves, and lots of group naps. We buried her in our field and will plant a tree in her honor come spring.
We quickly adopted a new dog named Mokie, and we’re training him to be a sheepdog for the farm. There wasn’t much time to grieve Millie’s loss with Mokie’s arrival, but now that things have calmed down during the winter we’ve been better able to process and grieve.
There are so many ways to honor the endings in our lives. In the moment, we’re often busy with the next thing that urgently needs our attention.
Taking the time to process and honor a big change or an ending helps us move forward. No matter how long it takes, give grief the space it needs.
It helps us acclimate to change and makes us more resilient for the next ending, whether it’s one we chose or not.
Honoring this ending
I had the urge to hit send on this as soon as I finished my round of edits. But I decided to give myself time to sleep on it and review it one last time.
I may still prefer beginnings, but honoring the endings is a practice I’m willing to get behind.
I’m sending so much love and appreciation your way. May all of your endings be honored, so that new beginnings may bloom.
